Stilettos & Levis

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Mothers and Daughters

I'm pretty sure that every angle on the subject of mothers and daughters and the dynamics of their relationships has been covered, be it in a book, a movie, a television show, magazine article, etc. I highly doubt that I have anything new to offer on the subject but, I feel I must say this...

Seven (7) days and six (6) nights past the age of twelve is far, FAR, FAR TOO LONG to spend on "vacation" with one's mother and grandmother!

This is just one more small pearl of wisdom I have recently acquired to add to my modest but valuable collection. I felt compelled to offer it up to the rest of the universe. There is no reason good enough to put one's self through that particular kind of torture and agony. I must advise against it.

To those of you who have gone before me in this endeavor:

God bless you. If you made it back alive, good work. If both your mother and grandmother made it back alive, I raise my glass to you. If you're not in jail for homicide, hats off to you. If you are, I understand. If all made it back alive, no one is in jail and you are still speaking, I bow down to you.

To those of you who will stubbornly ignore my advice:

God bless your soul. You are and idiot. Good luck, you'll need it.

And to my three new best friends:

Jim, Jack and Jose,
I just wanted to say thank you so much for all your help and support along the way. I know I could not have made without you. You boys are the best.

Monday, March 31, 2008

Knowing Your Place

I believe that it is imperative to know one's place in life. Knowing your place, of course, requires understanding that your place is relative to your current situation. I, personally, didn't think this was a particularly hard concept to grasp but, I recently had the misfortune of meeting two individuals who clearly find it more difficult than one would think. And well, being the kind hearted, understanding and helpful person I am, I've decided to post a few tips to guide those of you out there who may have trouble with knowing where/how you fit in.

*When meeting someone for the first time it is important to be warm and friendly but, understand that you are NOT yet friends. Handshakes are the most appropriate form of touching (hugs are acceptable every now and then but, be cautious). Speak to them in a most respectful manner and ALWAYS call them by the name they introduced themselves by.

*Romantic prospects/relationships: The occasional random make-out does not a relationship make. If you have not had the "DTR" (define the relationship talk) and you generally do not see the person more than twice in a two week period it's best to safely assume you are not in a relationship.

*If not in a romantic relationship with someone and they are not someone you would classify as a best friend it is not socially acceptable to show up on someone's door step in the middle of the night.

*If you are over the age of 21 you no longer reserve the right to sport a tiara for any reason other than if you are in fact actual royalty. Girls, grow up. There is a difference between cute and funny and just plain pathetic.

To my readers: Please remember that I am here for you and there is nothing wrong with asking for help. Should you need anymore assistance knowing your place all you have to do is ask. I will be more than happy to help.

Sunday, April 22, 2007

Rebuttle to HP's Rebuttle to Boot Straps and Lawyers

First of all I would most likely have just posted a comment to this post but, I wouldn't want to reduce myself to becoming a "groupie who believe(s) a comment is always necessary and should be longer than a novel."

Ethopian Restaurants--Bootstraps' rant on Ethopian restuarants didn't deserve a response at all...he ripped it off from Billy Crystal's rant in "When Harry Met Sally".

"Valentines Day - We should revert to the old days of the Roman empire. "As early as the fourth century B.C., the Romans engaged in an annual young man's rite to passage to the God Lupercus. The names of the teenage women were placed in a box and drawn at random by adolescent men; thus, a man was assigned a woman companion for the duration of the year, after which another lottery was staged." Or I can be Emporar Claudius II and propose an edict forbidding marriage because "married men were more emotionally attached to their families, and thus will not make good soldiers." I interpret soldiers in the 21st century as meaning a single man living his life.

I spent my last two Valentines Days snowboarding in Steamboat and at the Silk Stocking..."

Quite possibly one of the funniest things I've read in awhile because it's so ludacris! You are soooo much more traditional than you pretend to be... You know that you want to get married. EVERYONE knows that about you. And don't even think about replying with something ridiculous like "Yeah I want to get married but in the very distant future" because you and I both know you don't want it to be that far off.

You 2 are idiots and at this point, I think I pretty much own you both!

Love you,

Monday, March 12, 2007


The other day my colleague passed out these worksheets for us to fill out to help her with a campaign she's been working on. The directions were simple: in 10min. or less write down 25 things you fundamentally believe; include at least 2 beliefs about love, 1 belief about wishes/dreams, 1 impossible thing you choose to believe is possible and at least 1 about people. I thought it was something worth sharing with the class. Obviously we all know our beliefs, both the important and the silly, but I found it interesting to write them down and see them all strung together.

I believe it's better to tell the truth than a lie. I believe people are fundamentally good. I believe a smile can warm the coldest day. I believe that love lasts. I believe in unconditional love. I believe everyone looks best in jeans and a white tee shirt. I believe that everyone needs a swift kick in the ass. I believe that jealousy is a waste of time. I believe that cookie dough mends a torn heart. I believe in trusting your instincts. I believe you can kiss it and make it better. I believe in fate. I believe world peace is possible. I believe that time really does slow down in the summer. I believe in sweat, hard work and elbow grease. I believe in miracles. I believe in best friends and family. I believe in wishing on stars, pennies and eyelashes. I believe in the silver lining. I believe in magic. I believe the best conversations are about nothing. I believe that laughter is the best medicine. I believe in speaking your mind. I believe that the meaning of life is living. I believe in believing.

After writing it down, I was reminded that I am an optimist. I think I tend to get bogged down in the day to day and sometimes forget that. It was a refreshing reminder to myself and I encourage everyone to do it.

Monday, February 19, 2007

The Things We Never Say

I've been mulling over a question in my head now for a while: In relationships, friendships or otherwise, no matter how intimate, why are there things we never say?

It's a question I can't for the life of me seem to answer. Holding back is not my style. I almost always say what's on my mind with no use of a filter to the point that I'm "abrasive"(or so I was called this weekend). Which I take as a compliment; I'd much prefer to be honest and abrasive than sugary and fake. Yet even I hold back in my relationships. There are things I want to say and don't, things I know I should say and don't. Why?

What is everyone so afraid of? Do we hold back to spare the other party or to spare ourselves?

The people who sent this question orbiting through my mind seem to think the answer is pride. I can't decide if I agree. As someone who continuously humiliates herself being horrifyingly, honest/abrasive...can I really say it's my pride that holds me back?

Friday, December 01, 2006

Wish you were here...

The weather has been unseasonably warm but, Austin is still Austin. It's beautiful and full of life and, we actually received our first real snap of cold weather this week. The Christmas decorations are up down town and they lit the tree at the Capital.

How's life in Tennessee? Are you making friends? I'm sure you are; you're such a likeable guy. Are you handling the cold weather okay? I'm sure it's quite an adjustment from our steady 80 degree year round minimum temperatures.

Well, I have to say we sure do miss you. It's just not the same around here without you. We really have tried but frankly, we're not handling your absence all that well. The boys put on a brave face and a good show for most of the season but as the end grew near they just got all choked up. A lot of us have put on the old home movies from our fantastic trip to California last January to attempt to make ourselves feel better. We really did have fun on that trip, didn't we? Ahhh, those were the days. Alright, well please write when you have time. We hope you'll get a few days to come visit at Christmas. Remember to wear a hat when you go outside and play nice with other boys.

Love you,
Your Longhorn Family

P.S. Congratulations on winning Rookie of the Week! We're so proud of you, Vince. You'll always be Heisman in our book!

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Goodbye Bevo XIII

...For it's Bevo (XIII) we love the best
Hail, hail the gang's all here
And it's Bevo (XIII) we put to rest

You were born a winner; proven when you became a World Champion Steer at the age of three. Then you moved to Austin to continue your winning streak. You became a symbol of "courage, fighting ability, nerve, lust of combat, efficiency in deadly encounters and the holy spirit of 'Never Say Die' ".

You stood proudly on the side lines as a good luck charm to your boys in burnt orange for 16 seasons. You outlasted three head coaches and saw a number of players come and go. You saw Ricky win the Heisman, traveled to Washington D.C. to take part in President Bush's inaugural festivities and, although you retired in 2004 still got to see your boys win the National Championship last year.

Bevo XIII (Sunrise Express), you were a Texas idol. You've become a Texas legend. Goodbye, old friend. God's speed.

Take a moment, listen to TAPS and say a little prayer for Bevo XIII...