Stilettos & Levis

Monday, September 25, 2006

Trespassing at Walmart

We all have irritating errands we have to run, grocery, dry cleaners, etc. For many of us this list quite frequently includes either Target or Walmart.

I myself am usually a Target shopper but, the other day on my way home found a Walmart in a slightly closer proximity. I popped in to pick up a few things on my list and quickly remembered why I'm a Target shopper.

Walmart is a magnet for low class women and their spawn. It's amazing! Whether you're in a small town Walmart, a big city Walmart, or a Walmart in the heart of suburbia the second the double automatic doors slide open the scene is always the same. Bunches of women, usually shopping in pairs, in their faded jeans and ratty tee shirts, gabbing while they sluggishly push their carts down the most popular aisles, oblivious to the 9 dirty, unruly children following them. They only pause from their, what I imagine must be deep, conversation to discipline the children when one of then breaks something. These rude women glare intimidatingly at all clean, quiet shoppers without children as they try to edge past. They make the Walmart experience chaotic and excruciating.

While I carefully navigated through the maze of mongrules and their scary mothers, I pondered their situation...
I tried very hard to give these women with their terrible attitudes and lack of social graces the benefit of the doubt. I decided that perhaps their financial situations, lack of family or lack of family support maybe the cause of the bad situation that I and the rest of the Walmart shoppers were forced to endure along with them. I concluded that I myself may have a poor attitude if I had to drag at least 3 children under the age of 6 with me to run my irritating errands. But then...just as I was beginning to empathize with these women I remembered something. I am a logical person. If I had 3 or more small children and a friend in the same position and needed to go to the store, I'd ask her to watch them and of course, I in turn would do the same for her.

Certainly I can't be the only person to come up with this concept. So once again I was confused. Then I came up with another theory. I usually only run into these tacky women and their filthy hellions at Walmart, very rarely at Target. So it must be that it's a territorial thing. They glare at me because I'm trespassing on their turf. I am supposed to shop at Target! They are supposed to shop at Walmart and, we are not supposed to bother each other. As for why they bring all the kids...who cares? That is no concern of mine; us Target shoppers should stay out of their store and mined our own business!

To all of you Walmart shoppers: I apologize. You have my word, I will only shop at Target from this point on. You will never have to put up with me in your stores again!

Stupid Girls

Okay I want to start by first saying that I am not a feminist. I still think that boys should open doors and pull out chairs. They should kill the icky bugs that we (girls) don't even want to look at and, I'm not even opposed to them working while we stay home and raise the kids.

That being said, I am still glad that the feminist movement happened. I'm excited that I got to live in a time where I was a allowed to go to college. I'm over joyed that I'm not yet at home raising kids, that I'm out doing my thing getting to have a career. And then I come in contact with girls who make me embarrassed to be a girl, embarrassed to be 24 and infuriated upon learning that they too have a college degree.

IT'S NOT CUTE TO BE DITSY!

If you actually are a bit of an airhead by nature that's one thing but, pretending to be stupid because you think boys will think you're cute that way...AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! While you were getting that college degree did you take a history class? Did you learn anything about the feminist movement? Does it mean anything to you? Are you trying to set us back 50 years? And do you really want to have to dumb yourself down to catch a boy? You girls baffle me!

Let me explain a few things to you...
Being cute doesn't count for everything. I'm sorry but, you're looks aren't going to carry you through life, even on the boy front. Trust me I hang out with enough of them to know. You will always be just a piece of ass if you can't bring more than cuteness to the table. Those of you constantly relying on the "Cute and Ditsy" routine, ever find yourself in what you think is a relationship yet, it's been weeks and you still haven't met any of his friends?

Memo to you: You're not in a relationship. You're not going to meet the friends. You're JUST a piece of ass.

His mind set: Why introduce your friends to someone who's not going to be around very long? Especially when he's mildly embarrassed by her lack of polish and intelligence.

Then there are of course those of you who figure this out (while somehow managing to still not really admit it to yourself) and attempt to sink your hooks in permanently with a pregnancy. I'm humiliated by you and for you. I truly pitty you. Grow up. Get some self respect. Be proud of who you REALLY are and, find someone who'll love YOU. Stop trying to trick a boy in to loving you. It's pathetic and, believe me they see through it! (At least the one's who have me for a friend.)